That's a mighty fine hat you've got there, hatter.

Today was great. It was a half day at school so we basically has 25 minute classes, which were hella easy and we were pretty much done by around 11. Me and my friends went out to Jamba Juice and hung out for literally two and a half hours laughing. It was an extremely needed break, and it was nice to see that I actually did have people to hang out with. I just wished that Eirik was there! I invited him, but he said he had practice which was totally understandable, and I think he was shy about getting in and meeting with my friends and such, he's more comfortable in one-on-one than in small crowds. And his leg has a cast on it from a soccer-injury, so he's doing a lot of strength-training classes in order to be accepted into tryouts even though his kicking power isn't all it used to be. (He asked me to watch his games :D crazy excited).
 
So yea, I did get a rose from a guy at school today, but once again x.x, there is no hope of us dating or anything because of Eirik, one-man woman, you know, haha. But yea, it made me miss everyone in NY, and miss Eirik like crazy, whattabutt, what a horrible time to hurt your knee and not be able to walk. Also, why do I always go for the quiet ones that aren't comfortable around groups? I could easily just grab a nice guy, like the guy that gave me the flower, but my mind just isn't having it... I guess I want a challenge in a way, I want to fight for something to work out and to have my head in the air wondering if he feels the same way about me rather than just have it handed to me on a silver platter. I wonder if anyone else feels the same way?
 
<3,
Ali.

So yes, Final week finally over!! I wish I could tell you that I slept more than 10 hours this week, but alas, I can't.
Seriously though, I'll be asleep until Monday morning if anyone needs me.
SO glad I have tomorrow off :) finally have a chance work on my book of poems and my history assignment for graduation.
AND I GET TO SLEEP!
Can you tell that I want sleep? xD
 
But yes, I've been trying to ask around if anybody from NY can invite me to prom so I can go and hang out with everyone and dance, have fun, and just party all night after that. My friend Kaitlyn said she'd take me if no one asks her, but chances are, someone will ask her, so it's up to me to hunt down someone that would be okie to go with me. My #1 choice is my friend Teddy who visited me in Seattle before when he stayed with his family, we're pretty close and I'm sure he wouldn't mind, it's just that I'm not sure what group he's going to prom with; if it doesnt have my friends in it than sorry no can do!
 
To tell you the truth, I don't know when it would be better to visit NY. May 20ish so that I could party with Kait and see a selective amount of friends and have an awesome time, maybe even meet Dan. Or go June 20-23, see everyone and go to prom, and after-prom which is supposed to be absolutely cray, but maybe not be able to see Dan, and also not be able to spend quality time with some of my friends... I just don't knowww

So yes, finals week starts tuesday -dun dun dun-!
But anyway, the inspiration for this set was two things. The song 'scream and shout' by will.i.am and Britney (not a big fan of his songs, but this one turned out good), and the dude that has been slowly eating away at my common sense til I'm nothing but a puddle. The sad part is that even if he knows I like him, we're both shy and subtle to a fault, so it's hard to really figure out our intentions. And he's the type of guy that would be awk if he had to hang out with someone who likes him, but he doesn't like in that way... (or at least that's what it looks like). I really want to go to prom with him. And only him. If he's going with someone else, chances are I'll just go for the after parties (that I'll hopefully get invited into).
 
So yes. (I have a surprise for you Andi... now I can't tell you what it is until it's absolutely certain, but I think what I'm going to say next is going to give it away xD.) My friend Dan started texting me again, and just those two texts made me really happy... I might see him again in May, which would literally be THE highlight of my senior year. (;D may 24-27th Andi!! u better be free!! haha)
 
<3,
Ali.

Dedicated to the lovely @constant-as-the-stars-above, I love you Andi and Happy Holidays!
I miss you!
Two week break -WOOHOO!-
:D Now we'll definitely talk haha, there's just no other way - nope nope!-
But yes, if I'm alone on New Years, I'm counting on you!!
^^" Even if it's like 3 am in NY,
I apologize in advance!! haha.
But yes, I miss you and your laugh, our hugs, sitting on the floor talking about life and glomping each other when the we started crying about our lives.
_>).
And we've seen each other grow so much over the years. It's crazy to think of chu all grown up :,) I know it's silly, but true, you've grown so much even since the last time I've seen you <3, you've discovered your passions, and continue making amazing work that I'll look forward to seeing in person!! You've sung in front of your whole school! Met more guys, fell into step with a lot of different people and you continue to keep that amazing energy about you that draw people in.
And Thank you for always trying to chase away my demons,
And for being the best sister everr,
and I'll always try and be there for you like you've been for me :,).
Remember when we biked at least once a week that one summer to get jujubees and sit on the playground? :D haha, we should definitely do that again the next time we see each other.
That, and play ourworld, and bejewled,
and write stories, and make Easy Mac and Soup,
and make an intricate fort with pillows and blankets, stapling the ceiling in the process.
and sit in Ihop doodling on the paper placemat,
and stay up all night talking about life,
and play super smash bros,
and burn hand sanitizer,
and laugh about our crazy moms,
(and sometimes our craziness as well).
We should find another tree to sit in just for the memories,
and find a golf course to break into and sled down, yelling and tumbling all the way,
and cosplay and make amazingly funky makeup creations.
There are just so many memories, the trip to the beach where we found millions of little 'lost things' haha, our obsession with watching old Disney movies, preferably on DVR tapes ;)
and we absolutely
positively
HAVE to
play BAAA with Copper :D!!!
 
xD that's a must.
x3 And now I'm gonna go on another rant about life! So bare with me! haha, I know they're adding up:
----------
So yes. I haven't seen Eirik on the bus in a week... I think he's purposely trying to avoid the early bus. I don't know what to think. Maybe he is, maybe he isn't. I kind of desperately need to see him. I feel hazardous, this crush is definitely not the safe choice. But I guess that's one of the reasons I went after him in the first place. Maybe I overstayed my welcome? I think I just wanted to see my limits, take on a challenge. Silleh silleh girl.
 
But anyway, I walked home today because after standing at the stop for fifteen minutes I realized that there was no way he was coming, and that I didn't really want to wait for the bus to come, and that the sky and colors were to beautiful to miss out on. So I walked, and smiled at the green, and felt more happy than I've been in a while. If only I didn't have that god damn looming impression of being rejected, life would have been perfect!!!
Ah well, it was still pretty amazing to see the sun and the clouds, and the crisp green grass, the chestnut trees and the forest green pines, oh so much green!!
Ah you just had to be there, and it wasn't that cold either!
:) quite a beautiful walk.
(Andi :o if you visit, I'll walk you through it sometime)
 
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD!!!!!!!!
Dont mind all this 'end of the world' talk, o3o peeps be cray.
I miss you!
And I love you!!
I'm sure if you'd still be here, you'd be proud of me :), I really have been trying my very best.
Haha, then again, didn't I always?
That's why I got so mad when things didn't go as planned x3. You've got one determined daughter.
 

<3,
Ali.

50 items exactly!! xD how? I have no idea.
So yes, Physics quiz and pre-calc test today x.x.
I did okay on the physics quiz though!
Which is greatly appreciated -bows to teacher-.
It's funny because I've noticed that in almost every class, my friends are guys...
Is it weird that I have automatic angst when I have to talk to girls compared to guys?
I think it might be xD
I mean, not that I don't get nervous talking to guys,
but I avoid starting conversations with girls...
maybe they have hurt me more for some reason?
I mean, there've been studies that say that when someone's been rejected (be it girl, guy, or even animals (for mates, look it up, tis true, specifically for females though)) they retain 'luggage' per se, and will avoid people(or animals) that remind them somehow of the rejectees.
Maybe the threats of the mean middle school girls finally caught up to me?
Or maybe my mind's just getting an automatic buffer because I got hurt so badly when I had to leave all my friends (and sister) behind.
I have met a few amazing(girl) friends though,
and I really do love them <3.
 
Haha, I really did go on a rant about friends... I guess the set reminded me of it somehow?
Anyways, Have a happy friday tomorrow!!
 
<3,
Ali
xD first set in a while that wasn't posted at like, 10 pm.
P.S. I remember seeing the picture of the girl on a set somewhere but I don't remember where, D: I hope it didn't end up too similar.

I love this one.
This took wayyy too long haha; two and a half hours that I don't have. -cough-ihatetextbooknotes-cough-
Stayed in today because the day before I was so exhausted I slept through four periods... really bad, I know.
I really want high school to end god dammit!
Just to be done with all this mush that won't mean jack in the future.
My hardwork isn't measured in time, it's measured in letters and numbers.
I kind of hate that I only realized it now, not that I tried too hard in school, but still.
but yes, the guy from July texted me again today, we talked about finals and hurricans sandy and such.
I said that if he was every in Cali, he knows who to call!
Common USC dearie, accept me please. I beg of you. no really, accept me.
And I might get a black pug :).
But I don't exactly want one because I know it's going to be another fight when I go to dorm in college.
That and the Fiat that I really want, but know it's going to be a mess.
I'm not getting excited for them because I know the consequences.
Wow, don't I feel wise now xD.
But anyway, wednesday here I come!!
 
<3,
Ali

One of my old drafts.
I actually quite like this one :)
So yes, I've recently started using snapchat and it's absolutely amazing.
I can finally see the people I left in NY, Andi @constant-as-the-stars-above, and Kait and Vivi and Yui.
It's made me smile and feel that maybe I've not been fully forgotten.
I've missed their faces though, I guess I always will.
Life's been a little too crazy for me lately, too many apps, too much homework, too many projects, not enough sleep, friend time, guilt-free reading time.
Bah! I really have to stop rant-complaining.
Anyway :) it really was nice to see everyone on snapchat.
And I've kinda missed the guy I've liked on the bus the whole of last week D:
I think he went to a party with some of his friends.
Ah, I knew he'd turn into a popular-jock type eventually.
He's just too cute.
So yea, Happy Holidays!!!
Winter's definitely here :) time for sweaters!
 
<3,
Ali

It's been hard,
And the stress has kind of been eating me alive. But I'll be okay. Soon.
 
So many essays and so little time, but I'm almost done with my first one, and my other five are coming along pretty well. My personal goal for all of them is Dec. 20, if I don't have all the college apps. in by them, I shall smack myself.
 
I really hope I get into UW. It's really hard to get in. And I don't think my essays are too great, but I really really want to go there. If anything, and if I get rejected from there, I'm probably going to transfer in next year. Unless I get into USC, then there's almost no competition.
 
Even though i'd still rather be in UW.
 
So anyway, school's going okay, I finally get pre-calc, the amount of work in AP gov. is becoming bearable and English is still fun. So thats good!!
 
I just still feel like the apps are draining me in a sense -SOS!!- but hey, what can ya do. What has to be done, has to be done.
 
I'm also not sure exactly what he thinks of me. Chances are I'm just a friend to him, which is okay, but I need to know now before I get my hopes up. Hah, just kidding, they're already kind of up. Oh well, I shall survive!!
 
I actually really like how this set turned out x3. One of the best collage-like sets I've made in a while!
 
<3,
Ali

I dont know why I keep doing such light sets, oh well. I'll do a darker/brighter set next time :).
 
So yea, I finished almost all my college apps -yay!- I just have a few left that I have to do and a few paragraphs that I have to fill out (and two more teacher recommendations >__> kind of.
 
But yes, I hope everyone's weekend's been great! And I hope all the homework is done for tomorrow -just kidding, what is homework?-
 
<3,
Ali

So yes, it's been a little crazy lately.
But I've been getting better, attitude wise. At the start of this year I felt that my anxiety would literally turn me into a stick, but I finally feel like I'm settling down.
 
Of course, my mom's feelings about college, jobs and moving are butting against my life again, but hey, thats family right? But yea, I'm kind of extremely excited right now because on Saturday me and a few friends are going ice skating (even though my crush couldn't go D:). Haha, I'm going to fall on my arse sooo many times, but it's going to be totally worth it. (:
 
Oh!! Another thing that I'm ULTRA excited for is next weekend, we have a 5 day weekend!! It's crazy and unheard of and I'm totally loving it! Haha, I really don't think NY had that many days off for Thanksgiving, or maybe it did o.x, Andi, fix me if I'm wrong.
 
So yes, that's about all the exciting things happening to me in the next week or so, well that and I might actually be able to pass AP Government (Oh My Goodness! This can't be happening.) Haha :)
 
<3,
Ali.